(joke) Standing Virgins

"Standing Virgins"The Catholic priest in a small town had becomevery perturbed,and he decided to lay it on the lineto the congregation."Brothers and sisters," he said solemnly. "It has cometo my attention that immorality is rampant in our fairtown. To be specific, it is being said there is not onevirgin left. This vile lie must and shall be refuted. Inorder to do so, I ask every virgin in the congregationto rise."Not a woman stirred."I understand the modesty that would make a younglady hesitate to announce her condition publicly,"the priest intoned. "But it is necessary to do so.Young women, I ask those who are truly virginsto rise."And still not a woman stirred.Wrath now moved the priest. "Will you, for the fearof experiencing a small shame, incur a great one?I ask you in the name of Mother Mary herself. Letall virgins stand!"And as his thunderous tones died away, a younglady, far in the rear, with a baby in her arms, rosebashfully.The preacher stared with astonishment at her."Young woman, I have asked for virgins to stand.""Father," the young lady answered indignantly, "doyou really expect this six-month-old child to standby herself?"